My thoughts-2/15/2012

Today my parents talked to me about various things,
and one thing that particularly stood out to me was that
they said that the only person that I needed to worry
about was myself. I immediately thought, and this will
be a little extistentialism in me, that my life means
less to me than most other people's lives. My life is not
worth as much to me as others', such as Greg's or Marty's
means to me. I guess, the best way to describe this is by
saying that my life, while maybe not necessarily bad, was
misused and I honestly feel that if my soul were pitted
up against some other people, theirs would definitely be
more pure than mine. I do not deserve to live as much as
another person, but that is not how life works. I realise
this, and I think this is a large flaw in life, but what
can I do? It is not up to me to decide how life works,
but it is up to me to decide how my life will be lived.
I want this life that I live to be one for the people,
even though I know that with how greedy and pro-self I
can get, that this will not truly be the case. I think
that if I didn't think about my own interests as much, as
I want to, then I would be a much better person. When I
am not put on the spot, as I am now, I know that my
greatest desire is to help others. I understand how
others feel and I can kind of feel how they feel as well.
I rejoice at anothers' rejoicing, and I share their pain.
My best interests are anothers' best interests at heart.